Day Five

The school day draws to an end on campus as everyone bustles about. They form in groups and talk loudly on phones, all trying to decide which party they will attend tonight. The frats will have one, the athletes, and possibly the sororities. Full of beers and liquors and sinly good fun. All around, it will be a good night for the college students of SFA.

But I, however, will sit up in the laundry room with Chey as we watch our clothes go 'round and 'round cause the dorm is finally quiet enough, calm enough, empty enough for us to get peace. Because I am not the type to stand out, make a fuss, draw peoples attention, I will miss out on parties, no matter how bad I would like to go. Instead, every Friday night I will sit in the laundry room, watching my clothes go 'round and 'round.

I know, you get it. I'm a sad person with sad feelings who just wants to be accepted. So does everyone else. But the thing is, I was accepted. In high school I had my theatre people, the friends I spent almost every waking hour with. They were who kept me together, swimming, functioning in this sometimes terribly shitty world. But I don't have them anymore and I won't even be going out for this school's theatre until the spring semester. So until then, I'll have Chey and her crazy fiance.

College really isn't all that bad. The people are annoying and the professors can be jerks, but it's not altogether bad. The atmosphere is fun, bright, and very hot. God, it's so hot here. I do believe that if I apply myself, I can change my circumstances and in three years I could be throwing a party that everyone comes to. (Not gonna happen, I don't even like cleaning up after myself.) Just to be involved and part of the "in-crowd" would be nice for once.

But I guess, in the end, I'll always have theatre people.

As always, spread the fresh wherever you go.

Day Three (On the edge of Four)

I think one of the hardest parts for me about being in college is not seeing my boyfriend or talking to him as often. I mean, I knew that would be hard, but this is ridiculous. Especially since my roommate and her fiance are so similar to us. They do things or he says something, and my mind immediately races to the times that we did that or he said those things. It's a hard game.

Many of my friends have experienced long-distance relationships, and I never understood their pain. Hell, Jon and I saw each other nearly every day; at the most we spent three days apart. He had unintentionally become every part of my life. And being away from him... it's like being without air. It feels as if I'll never breathe properly again until I'm wrapped in his arms.

As I'm typing this, it's hard to hold back tears. Chey has no clue I'm writing a blog or trying to keep myself in check, keep the emotions inside. HE has no clue how crazy it drives me when I know he's seen the texts, knows how desperate I am, but decides to ignore it anyway.

Relationships are hard and come in so many varying types. I have always held a close relationship with him, but now, as the one year is coming up two, we seem to be pulling away, sometimes pushing. This seemingly once so close pairing is ripping at the seams and he doesn't see it, doesn't feel it, but I do.

I am ripping at the seams but no ones seems to see it, to hear it, to want to know the truth.

I am a college student who writes a blog to get out those feelings that no ones ever asks about anymore. I'm writing to share my life, my relationship, my love, my fears, my nooks and my crannies. It's a hard knock life out there folks, and I'm not even fully grown.

Remember to stay fresh,
Kaylee

First Post

This is my second day of college life. I have a five hour gap between my only two classes today and I decided to use that time to make a blog. I also went to WalMart and when I got back, there were absolutely no parking spots left. It took me thirty freaking minutes to find a spot, a mile away from my dorm.

Dorm life isn't bad. The girls seem nice and I've met like three guys. One of them is my roommate's fiance, his roommate -who keeps to himself.. and his lady friends *wink, wink*. Oh and this guy I met today who asked me to show him where the laundry room was. So happy I knew that or I wouldn't have gotten to talk to him. He seemed really cool, and super nice.

The library on campus is pretty lame, but there are these couches set up right next to the third floor windows that are perfect for sitting and reading. Reading the book I brought into the library with me. (A book I've read five times through.) But besides that, the Student Center has a Starbucks I would totally check out... except it's across campus and the people at the one across the street are wayyyyy nicer.

Well, that seems like a good enough first post.

Stay fresh my friends.